When did I get this old?

I haven't have a good ol'fashioned profane rant on a Monday for quite some time. (I blame kids for dulling my senses.) I guess I just don't get worked up as I used to. Well, let me give it a shot this afternoon.


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So I'm at the gym the other day at 6am. Yeah, I know....IDIOT me. However, after making a surprise visit to the Cleveland Clinic and the cardiac ICU last month, I've decided to start watching myself a little bit better. While I'm there, there's a guy and his son...probably 11 years old. Kid has on a tank top and pajama bottoms, as well as a towel thrown over his shoulder. Now, I'm all for father-son bonding....but getting your kid up at 6am to bust his ass about doing lat pull-downs is a bit over-the-top. What makes it worse, his old man is barking at him, talking about how "other kids going out for football got up at 5am" while he got up at 5:30am.

If you drag your kid out of bed at 5:30am so he can go lift weights with your dumb-never-achieved-anything-in-your-own-life ass...then you're a fucking loser. I'm all for pushing your kids to be the best that he can be...but I've seen it time and time again in my own youth. Dad pushes son way way way too hard, and by age 17, kid has had enough of sports and even sticks needles between his toes on the weekend, or dances in a cage dressed as the biker from the Village People.

Bottom line...just because you didn't make the JV football team as a kid, doesn't mean you have to ruin your son's life the same way. Let your kids make their own mistakes, make their own interests. It's not his fault you were smoking bongs, driving your camero and listening to Kix during the late 80's.

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Speaking of lost youth...when in the hell did I get so old so quickly? My wife and I are walking through the mall yesterday looking for some summer shirts. Now, those of you who know me know...I'm not a big fashion minded person. Give me some golf shirts, a pair of jeans and I'm good to go. However, walking through the stores yesterday, I suddenly realized that I'm becoming my dad. WHO IN THE HELL decided that faded pale-blue PBR shirts are suddenly cool? Why do all the jeans have 52 rips in them? Why does every single dress shirt have to be orange, plum or neon green? WHO in the fuck decides this is cool? I don't know about you, but I blame that G*d damn Ryan Seacrest. Speaking of which...who came up with this whole long-hair-is-back-in thing that Adam Morrison (from Gonzaga) has going on is cool? We had long hair kids when I was in school, but they weren't athletes...they were burn-outs and hessians, and they wore faded Bon Jovi jackets and smoked Marlboro's behind the Dairy Queen.

I knew I wasn't going to be young forever, but I didn't think this whole transformation would happen to me. I can't imagine the time...sooner-rather-than-later mind you...where my kids are going to laugh their ass off at me for listening to Van Halen and living in a world without microwave ovens for a time. I guess I wasn't meant to understand. I may as well just stay at home...wear my black sox with my white shorts and get ready for Perry Como reruns to show up on TV.

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Husker spring football is here.....

Can't do it. Gotta save some hate for later on this year. Let the record show however that this will be a make or break for Husker fans around here....with all of the expectations surrounding your program this year...we shall see if they prosper or fold like a deck of cards. But hey...you beat Colorado (who quit on their coach) and Michigan (in a game that ESPN analyst Kirk Herbstreet called, "the worst officiated game I've ever seen).

Again...we shall see.

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Huskers vs. Mizzou in baseball next weekend.

"Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz"

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In a final college basketball note, many got on my case for saying that a mid-major would never go to a final four. Yes, I was wrong...however....look how the stars aligned just right for GW. After two solid wins, they had to play that perrineal power Wichita State, who puts the fear of god into everybody they play. Then, in the biggest of big games...got to play UConn in front of 18,000 of their own fans.

Granted, it's a great accomplishment for them...but as the Final Four ass-pounding they got from more-talented Florida goes to show...this was more the exception than the rule. I'd be shocked if it wasn't at least another 25 years before another small-school makes it. Call me a hater....whatever.

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Is it just me, or is Stephen Colbert's show on Comedy Central hysterical?



AJ