The Official Huskerh8er 2005 Big 12 Preview

It's finally that time of the year! Time for my patented Big 12 Championship football preview. I CAN'T LOSE!!! CALL NOW AND RECEIVE A FIVE TEAM PARLAY ABSOLUTELY FREE!!! VEGAS IS SCARED TO DEATH OF ME, AND NOW YOU CAN GET SOME OF THE ACTION TOO!!!!!!

Ok, maybe not..but I did nail the North and South Champs last year, including the not-very-on-a-limb pick of OU as champions. But alas, it's a new year. Texas is loaded...Nebraska is overhyped, and Mark Mangino is still gigantic. So, without further adieu, I present to you what will happen in the Big 12 this year. Don't say I didn't tell you long ago when December rolls around.

SOUTH (Predicted Finish):

1: OKLAHOMA SOONERS (9-2) - You cannot put a price on experience, and OU has pretty much done it all. Again, never underestimate the drive of a team who finished second last year. You'll see a lot of people picking Texas here, but don't buy the hype. Talent alone will not win you a division title, and in this case, two big games. (Vs. OU and Tech). More on Texas later, but in the meantime, never bet against Bob Stoops. Dude is a prick, but he knows how to win. A road game against UCLA should send a strong message that the Sooners are going nowhere. Their matchup with Tech is toward the end of the year, and look for OU to have things wrapped up by then.

2. TEXAS TECH RED RAIDERS (9-2) - I don't crae if Sonny Cumbie is gone. You could put my 3 month old as QB of that offense, and it would go. Their wide receivers are LOADED this year, and their schedule is a cakewalk (for south standards), with the only road tests against Nebraska (I use "test" loosely), Texas (who I'll get to in a second), and a rebuilding OSU team. THE ONLY thing keeping the Red Raiders from making a serious run is that hump I was talking about. If the Raiders can beat UT in Austin...and I think they can...look for them to be 8-0 heading down the stretch.

3. TEXAS LONGHORNS (8-3) - DO NOT buy the hype. Any reasonable prognosticator can see this letdown coming a mile away. I saw it during the Missouri and Oklahoma games, and it isn't going anywhere anytime soon..and that is the ability to half-ass it through certain games. Look for the OSU game early on to kick the Longhorns in the nuts hard enough to send shockwaves throughout the UT camp. Once they meet OU in Dallas, the pressure will be so great, you'll be able to hear Mack Brown gulp from here. Expectations can crush a program..and as loaded as they are...this is a no-brainer. Don't forget I told you so when it happens.

4. TEXAS A&M AGGIES (6-5) - A&M is a nice little team that would be great...if they didn't have to play Tech, OU and UT every single year. Each year, it seems like they lose two games they shouldn't and two games that they should. This year is no exception, even with a great QB like Reggie McNeal at the controls. Franchione is a decent coach, but he doesn't have nearly enough talent to hang with the other three on list. Road trips to Colorado, Tech and OU look pretty damn daunting from here.

5. OKLAHOMA STATE COWBOYS (4-7) - WHO in the hell came up with this schedule? Not only do the Pokes play in the loaded South, not only are they rebuilding, but their northern opponents are the top three teams in the other division. The Cowboys have some talent, and will win a couple of games against teams during that stretch (most likely Missouri or Tech, who will be looking past them to OU)...but the brutal string of games from October through November will be too much. Maybe next year.

6. BAYLOR BEARS (1-10) - WHY IN THE HELL are the Baylor Bears in the Big 12? Yuck. I'm not going to waste any more time on these guys. I've read the previews and seen what they have coming in. Eesh. Good luck boys.

NORTH (Predicted Finish)

1. COLORADO BUFFALOES (8-3) - For some reason, it seems fashionable to bash the CU Buffaloes. Sure, they hired hookers for recruits, bashed a female kicker and made her cry..but get oustide the inferiority complex of Nebraska, and Gary Barnett has done a pretty good job. Joel Klatt is a damn good QB, and a core of returners come back for CU. Once again, do not underestimate the power or returning players with something to prove. As usual, CU has a killer schedule, including a mauling in teh making at Miami of Florida. They get Missouri at home, and Iowa State and Nebraska late in the season. They're on the road at KSU, but have shown many times that they can win in the Crappy Apple...especially when the Mildcats are down. Of course the North is a tossup this year..but I'll be damned if you can pick anybody but Colorado at this point.

2. MISSOURI TIGERS (7-4) - Someday..sometime, Missouri is going to bust out of their shell. As anybody who has followed the Tigers know, Mizzou's biggest opponent is themselves. Last year, they had more talent than anybody in the big 12 not named OU or Texas. (who finished 2nd in defense by the way), and yet were outcoached by themselves to a 5-6 record. It's pretty scary when the ONLY reason people aren't hyping Mizzou is the simple fact that they're Mizzou. I'm not doing anything crazy, like picking them to win the North, but the talent IS THERE for a big big run. Their game with UT on the first at Faurot is huge for credibility and confidence. They win that..lookout. I'm also anxious to see what Gary Pinkel does to unleash Brad Smith. Better do it now Gary..this is his last year.

3. KANSAS STATE WILDCATS (6-5) - How in the hell do you go 4-7 with Darren Sproles and a schedule that is weaker than Omaha Bryan's? Easy, lose to Marshall at home, have your players quit and make sure your coach is so old he can't get his players' attention for more than five minutes. KSU is a good program with a lot of good athletes. Something tells me they aren't going to be nearly as bad as people think...but with Meier and Webb at QB..it's hard to predict them to go too far. Look for KSU to earn a bowl game birth by the skin of their teeth over a Mizzou team that yet again will fail to find away to win in Manhattan. (A win over Nebraska is in the cards too)

4. IOWA STATE CYCLONES (5-6) - Can somebody tell me why everybody is picking ISU to do anything this year? Sure, they finished near the top of the North last season, and return a lot of guys...but it was the NORTH, and NOBODY was worth a crap last year. As shown in their last game against Mizzou last year (where they choked away a Big 12 title game birth at HOME against a Tiger team who had already packed it in), this team does not know how to handle success. Trust me...throw some expectations at somebody, and it's a whole new ballgame. Maybe they'll prove me wrong..but I just don't see it.

5. NEBRASKA CORNHICKSTERS (4-7) - There is a guy here at work who predicted the Huskers will go TEN AND ONE this season. TEN AND ONE!!! Let me get this straight: You have a career sub .500 coach who is still settling in his own players, you have a Juco QB who has never played a game of D1, you have tons of freshman starting in a system they aren't familiar with, with a defense full of holes at DB that sucked giant ass last year. (I didn't even mention horrible special teams) And THIS team is to go 10-1? Are you kidding me? Bill Callahan will find out real soon how quickly the Red Menace will raise it's ugly head. Just a couple more bad losses, and people will be hanging themselves from streetlights. He pulled in a very nice class, but since when did 18 year old freshmen win you games? This isn't basketball and the 95 Michigan Wolverines. Sure, Adrien Pederson was 18 last year, but you don't exactly have OU talent. What's that you say? Who are the seven losses? Easy: Pitt, OU, Tech, KU, KSU, Mizzou and Colorado. Call me what you want...write more hate mail if you want...Bill Callahan has shown me NOTHING in the past four years...and yes, my 3 year old could have won the AFC title game at home with Rich Gannon, Jerry Rice and Tim Brown. We shall see.

6. KANSAS JAYHAWKS (4-7) - Before the Jayhawks get the death penalty, they'll manage to win a couple of games with two-tons-of-fun under the headset. Look for KU to get spanked like a whore throughout the Big 12 season with their biggest win coming against Nebraska, ending a 34 year old streak. The game with Mizzou may prove to be another high point, but the Stay Puft Marshmallow coach has a tough road ahead to pull out of the cellar.

BIG 12 CHAMPIONSHIP GAME:

Near repeat of last year -

Oklahoma 27 - Colorado 14

Fire away......