December 12, 2007

Creightonh8er

OK.

For those of you who have been with me for quite a while, you’ll know I’m anything but unpredictable. In fact, as many of you have stated…I’m beyond predictable. I”ll always tell you how crappy your effort was. I’ll compare your players to thugs and criminals 100% of the time…every time and twice on Sundays. I’ll ALWAYS, no matter what the situation, explain to you that Tom Osborne may be a nice guy, but is one of the most overrated and over appreciated coaches in the history of the game.

But for this one post…for this one sliver in time, I’m going to break you off a curve.

I’m going to put on my yellow corncob hat…throw on my “Bo knows Mo wins” or whatever lame-as t-shirt you’ve made this week that would make a Sig Ep at Florida State proud..and for this one day, I’m going to stand with you…side by side…pitchfork in hand, or whatever.

On the way home today, I listened to noted Creighton slobber-master Matt Perrault go on about this “boycott” of the Nebraska vs. Oregon game at Qwest Center Omaha on Saturday. Apparently hard-core "Creighton fans" (or radio hosts with no other shot at ratings other than play to a neglected audience) are pissed off that Nebraska is playing the game on..and I quote..."Creighton's home court". (Like it's a 85 year old fieldhouse on campus or something) For those of you out of the area, let me break this down a bit for you.

Creighton is this little piss ant Jesuit school right next to downtown that has like 5 sports and 6,000 students. In 1991 they went to the College World Series. Shortly after that, they went to an NCAA tournament behind a guy named Bob Harstad, who looked something like a cross between Brady Quinn and that caveman in the Geico commercials. Then, in the late 90’s, Dana Altman showed up, and they started to win a few games. (Despite playing in the most horrifically overrated conference on the face of the earth).

What’s that you say? Sounds like the perfect alternative for me to root for? Sounds like the absolute ideal situation for a guy who would rather slice his wrists than watch yet another Johnny Rogers commercial for Century 21 or Roto Rooter or whatever else the hell he’s hawking this week. Well sure…only one problem. Creighton fan is every bit as bad as Husker fan and then some.

Why?

Because they are the same damn guy, that's why.

As I was trying to avoid running off the road as Matt Perrault boasted, “This is a Bluejay town all the way”, I thought to myself how absolutely re-goddamn-diculous it is for ANYBODY in their right mind to think that ANY team within 500 miles of this place would COMPARE to the myopia and blind idiocy that is Husker fan. Yet, “Bluejay fan” does them one better, because “Bluejay fan” doesn’t have the balls to root for a shitty Nebraska basketball team.

Are there a couple of Creighton students who don’t root for Husker football? Sure, maybe a couple. But you can’t tell me for ONE SECOND that 98% of those blue-clad freaks that fill the Qwest 18 times a year don’t have a Husker hat they’ve worn since 1985 or a special Eric Crouch jersey they bust out for special occasions. I mean, it’s one thing to be an arrogant prick…but it’s quite another to be an arrogant prick AND actually root for a different (even "rival") team in a comparative sport.

Here’s the part where I back the Huskers.

If batshit crazy Steve Pederson had one good idea, it was to schedule a game in a public arena against a top flight opponent. ("Creighton" and "top-flight opponent" have never been spoken in teh same sentence in the history of man.) It’s bad enough the arrogant and stuck-up aholes who make up the Creighton Athletic Department swiped up all the NCAA 1st and 2nd round tourney tickets last summer. But for them to actually BITCH about the Huskers using a public facility in their own state just takes the Bluejay love of themselves to new levels.

I will say this one more time…you CAN NOT root for one team in one sport, and then bash them in another. I let a lot of crap slide around here. I let you people go on your little rants. I let you blather on about me moving to another state blah blah blah. but this is one thing I can not simply let slide. I mean, at least I understand WHY Husker fans are arrogant. You win 9 games a year for 40 years..yeah…I could see how you’d get a tad bit smug.

But how a piss ant school that nobody gave a rats ass about until they moved into a fancy new arena can get the sack to act as egotistical as they do just baffles me. They’ve won THREE NCAA games since 1974. THREE. 1…2…3. (The last one was on a last second shot from 25 feet. The other two were against that perennial hoops power New Mexico State in 1991 and a four point thumping of 7th seeded Louisville in 1999. Creighton has NEVEr won a second round game. To put that into perspective, George Mason won more NCAA games than that in the 2006 NCAA tourney alone.)

And don’t give me this horseshit about the Missouri Valley being as tough as any conference in the country. I don’t care how many times you spin it…I don’t care how many non-conference games they may win…Northern Iowa will ALWAYS be Northern Iowa. Since 1939 FOUR teams from the Valley have made the Final Four. (The latest was Larry Bird and Indiana State in 1979. How old were you in 1979. And don't forget prior to 1974, something like 8 teams made the tourney field)

These retired dentists, doctors, lawyers and bandwagon passengers of all ages are EVERY SINGLE bit the arrogant prick Husker fan is...with 1000 fewer examples of success. Why is this? BECAUSE THEY’RE THE SAME DAMN FAN. The same pathetic idiots who sat in the Devaney Center and rooted on Eric Piakowski and Clifford Scales, now scrunch up their nose at the thought of Nebraska taking over “their” home court. I wouldn’t even be surprised if Biff and Muffy Creighton fan weren’t in their exact same seats last December when the Huskers won the NCAA volleyball crown.

Sickening.

So go ahead Husker fan. Take that damn place over this weekend. In fact, go in and trash the place if you so desire. Let those pricks know just who you are and what you’re about when they sit down in their seat two days later to take in that epic clash between Dana Altman’s troops and perennial hoops power Houston (Baptist). Switch the seat numbers around, replace the cotton napkins with paper…hide the rack of lamb trays..whatever it takes, you have my blessing. Now granted, there are really only about three dozen of you who even follow Husker basketball…but damnit, I want you to go out there and make a statement.

So for those of you who thought the hate express was taking the winter off due to a crappy Husker basketball team; look no further than the most over hyped and least challenged bandwagon in town. Sure, Creighton fan may have prime seats and the most cozy arena in the nation…but you now have piece of mind knowing that that douche will be freezing his ass off in Lincoln next November watching the Huskers fall to Colorado.

Just because he has on a different color sweatshirt doesn’t make him any less lame and pathetic.

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21 Comments:

Blogger Husker Mike said...

I stopped listening to Perrault when he first threw a fit when it was announced that Nebraska was going to play a basketball game in UNO's hockey arena. His station is one of the lowest rated stations in town for a reason.

11:50 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Moving out of Omaha a few months ago after living there for 18 years, I have to completely agree with you, A.J. I have a ton more respect for schools that play in a school-sponsored arena than I do for Creighton playing in something that is a corporate money machine. If you go to those lengths to serve alcohol, that tells you how true of a fan base you really have. Creighton "fans" go to games to show themselves off, shoot the shit with their big shot friends, and drink. No other reason; it's Omaha, there ain't much else to do in the Winter. Once this place ages, the crowds will dwindle. I'd much rather go to a dingy alcohol free arena with a true basketball spirit that seats 9,000-10,000, most of which are die hard student fans, than the Qwest. I've been three times, and it makes me sick.

12:25 AM  
Blogger TB said...

As a closet Creighton fan, I can say that Matt Perrault does not speak for me.

9:52 AM  
Blogger AJ said...

(Laughing at TB)

Let the record show, I was only listening to Perrault because 1620 was talking to Jeremy Crabtree for the 553rd time this month about people I don't care about.

I don't even mind Travis Justice so much, but Perrault has turned into a Grade A prick over the past few months for some reason. (Even more than he was before).

It's like being lectured by some preppy East-Coast frat boy who has no earthly idea about how the world works.

I'm shocked he's still on the air personally.

9:54 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Matt "D-Bag" Perrault was so very upset because Nebraska is bringing in their own BBall floor. He said that "its our home court, and we should have our name on the floor" Thats a bunch of BS. Its not CUs building.
Then I proposed the following to him. When Omaha builds a new stadium downtown for the CWS and CU uses it during the regular season, are they going to boycott the CWS because they removed the CU logos? That would only make sense with his reasoning. What a dumbass

10:49 AM  
Anonymous Brushpile Bill said...

So this is a local thing, right?

1:08 PM  
Blogger NE-Jhawk said...

And to think...NU fans have problems with KU bandwagon fans? How's your non-revenue sport doing?

Loosing fans to Creighton, that's how it's doing...

6:25 PM  
Anonymous Growler said...

AJ... I love this topic. It applies nicely to kansans who call themselves kU basketball fans and kState football fans. Even worse, I once met a guy who went to Baker University (in kU's back yard) and claimed to be a kU basketball fan and a NEBRASKA football fan. I guess his second cousin's wife's twice removed uncle lived in Nebraska. Damn it would be nice to cherry pick your teams. Its as lame as giving yourself a nickname.

Uh, I think I'll be a USC football fan, a Duke basketball fan, a Patriots fan, and you can't forget the Red Soxes.

Hilarious... Creighton fan, what a crock.

11:07 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

What would happen if someone at Creighton decided it was time to have a NCAA Division 1 football program?? HAHA

2:00 AM  
Blogger TGRLVR said...

Man AJ,

Just when I thought you'd covered the spectrum in ways to insult the nubbies you one-up yourself. Not even two weeks go by after they pick a new head coach that will likely last less than 3 years and you devote an entire column to...

Creighton?

A school that doesn't even field a football team?

During Bowl season?

Do any of your little red-clad friends have any comprehension of just how irrelevant they've become? This was just cold.

Nicely done.

9:56 AM  
Anonymous kctiger75 said...

AJ, this is eerily similar to the KU basketball / KSU football fans who came out of the closet in the 90s.

Scary.

10:22 AM  
Blogger Andrew said...

Your a lot funnier when you are on are side! Keep up the good work.

10:36 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I had some of these 'HuskerJays' or 'BlueCorns' or 'Buttholers' or whatever the hell you want to call them sitting behind me at a Nebraska BBall game during Collier's last year.

"They should get Dana Altman down here and coach."

So what's the implication? Collier should go because he's not winning? Altman would rather coach here than at CU, um why? Get Altman so you can root for Nebraska? You're really a Dana Altman fan and not really a Creighton fan? (Your tshirt says different, your hat says something else entirely. Do you have Texas underwear on?)

You really just like rooting for winning teams? DING DING DING.

Assholes.

I hope they gave up their season tickets in Memorial Stadium during the BC Dark ages for a real college sports fan.

12:58 PM  
Anonymous Dana Altman Coach who Gets fired from Kansas State and then becomes the greatest coach in the MVC said...

Fuck Creighton,Fuck Kyle Korver, and Fuck MAtt PErault. He has lived here for like 4 years and he thinks he knows and hates everything about Husker basketball (gimmick as you said). Creighton fans go to games to drink beer and be seen, thats it, it has nothing ot do with pride in the school or any of that other bullshit. Even a husker hater can see how fucking gay these people are. Especially those faggots that wear half red and half blue shirts, somebody should shoot those dumb mother fuckers. THe worst person though is the guy who roots for Husker Football, Creighton basketball, and husker baseball. fags.

3:17 PM  
Blogger AJ said...

I appreciate the comment, becuase it's true.

However, try to keep your gaybashing to a minimum if you would please.

Thanks.

PS - Funny though.

3:34 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

AJ is worried about the 'gay bashing' because of Truman's recent encounter in another post.

3:45 PM  
Blogger AJ said...

It's just unnecessary.

I don't mind if it you're joking around in context but multiple slurs just screams redneck.

3:49 PM  
Blogger NE-Jhawk said...

Grew up in Omaha and went to KU from 95-99. I met one person in my entire life that is a KU BB/KSU FB fan.

We don't root for our rivals. We leave that to our friends to the north.

6:36 PM  
Anonymous Sauce said...

I laughed when AJ called out the db's who root for different teams in different sports. In Wichita, Kansas it's simply awful. This town is full of people who root for KSU football, KU basketball, and WSU (Wichita State Univ) baseball. You could tell what time of year it is by going to the gym to workout and seeing what shirt is being worn by these f bags. The Midwest truly is a cesspool at times.

7:17 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

come on AJ as a fellow Husker hater where is the article about the hiring of Pelini...the hiring of a guy NO ONE else wanted. The guy has been trying like mad to get a job and no one was taking. One LSU blog had up to 11, ELEVEN!!!, teams that Pelini's agent has contacted within the last 3-4 years and no they all said thnaks but no thanks.....come on AJ they hired a guy no one wanted, what do you think of a girl who was turned down 10 times to the prom, or a guy who was turned down by every business in toen.....the logic isn't hard to come to conclusions on

9:10 PM  
Blogger Fernando said...

Creighton fans are trash. They leave the Qwest Center with five minutes left in the game whenever they are losing to Drake (two years in a row now), and then they claim to be true basketball fans. I imagine they do this whenever they are getting their asses kicked in their own arena.

What makes Creighton basketall fans trash though is their smug attitude and coarseness and vulgarity. At tonight's game at Drake, Josh Young suffered a bloodied nose. The refs let the action continue. With absolutely ZERO CONCERN for the injured player (I have NEVER witnessed such sickening, appalling behavior in sports fans before), the Bluejay fans are screaming "Make that!" Of course, being a Creighton player, he misses.

Then the mass of human waste known as Creighton fans yell profanities directed at the injured Drake player. I won't repeat what was said - truly disgusting. He was "faking" pretty well apparently - as there was a small pool of blood right where his head landed on the court.

(I sat in the "Creighton section" with my wife.) In response, I yelled out loud that Creighton fans are trash because they have NO CLASS. About ten guys looked at me and froze for about five seconds, before resorting to their natural state of filth and human waste.

Honestly, Creighton University is a small, Jesuit private school for spoiled rich kids, frat boys with no social skills, and arrogant bastards. Too bad for Bluejay fans that Drake University has a small arena that caters to a family-oriented fanbase, i.e. no alcohol is served in the Knapp Center, as opposed to the focus on generating corporate profits via beer sales and other artery-clogging fare at Qwest.

The Bulldog mascot of Drake was also assaulted by some liquored-up Creighton skank/whore, as she shoved him in the back three times as he walked away. He was having some fun at some Creighton douchebag's expense. He got in the guy's face and made the pussy step back about three feet. Then the kid's girlfriend/hooch shoved the mascot in the back. A local Des Moines cop assigned to the arena had to calm things down. What can I say? Creighton fans are worthless pigs.

As an aside, Creighton's law, dentistry, and medical programs are not top-notch schools. Just look at the attrition numbers of Creighton law students. Hell, Nebraska is a top-tier law school and tuition there costs about one fourth of what Creighton does (for in-state students). Congratulations, Creighton alumni and students. You pay four times the cost of a real legal education in the same state. Creighton fan = disgusting, deplorable, corroded piece of trash.

11:21 PM  

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