August 28, 2006

Calm Before the Storm - Random musings

After listening to 1620 the Zone's Kevin Kuglar (who I actually think is a pretty good broadcaster, despite his "aw shucks" hokey attitude and his manlove infatuation with the Cubs) today, I told myself that when I got home, I was going to unleash a Husker rant something good.

Having a Husker rant build up inside is kinda like that feeling you get the day after drinking 12 Natty Lights. You know you're going to be OK..but there's something awful you just gotta get out of you. Sometimes it's at your command...sometimes, it does it on it's own.

Anyhow, I was trying to come up with whatever angle to rant on today: Callahan's 11-10 record vs. Division 1 teams....The Lincoln Journal Star casting a fictional "Husker Movie"...or any one of five-hundred various Jim-Bobs who cross my path at work every day who ask me what I think about the upcoming season.

It basically hit me that I'm completely tapped least for now. I've told you how overrated they are. I've told you how their defense is a farce. I've told you how it's ridiculous to anoint Zac Taylor the second coming of Joe Montana when the guy wasn't even in the top 1/2 of starting QB's in the big 12 last year statistically. I"ve told you how USC is going to colon-pound the Huskers like Andy Dick at an after-hours Emmy party. I've told you how the rest of the conference is going to stack up this year.

The only thing left to do is wait. Wait for the longest 3-4 days of the year, when all the pre-season hype is over, and there's nothing left to do but play ball. It all starts with the Mighty Chips of Central Michigan on Thursday night (Wife's an alum) and it just rolls on from there. Am I expecting a Husker loss on Saturday? Not really. Teams like La Tech, who regularly play in front of 3 dozen people in a swamp usually don't fare well when they look up and see 80,000 gomers wearing the same sweatshirt. But do I expect the Husker starters to be in the game well into the 4th quarter? You bet.

Official predictions coming Thursday.

- Am I the only person who doesn't watch entourage on HBO?

- The official Huskerh8er tailgate will be taking place on Saturday, September 9th at the Missouri football game vs. Mississippi. Just as last year, expect in-depth drunken analysis, audioblogs and tailgate play-by-play from some of the dumbest fans on earth, as they leave for Columbia at 1am, guzzling beers and tequila all the way down. It will be hard to top members of our tailgate party wetting themselves and throwing up..all before 9am...but we'll do what we can to top it. This year's theme: Fajita Fiesta.

- Why do I get the feeling that the Kansas City Chiefs won't have another winning season until the 2020's? The NFL is extremely cyclical, and I just get this feeling that bitter, evil Chiefs fan is in for a very harsh season. Don't ask me why...just do.

- Finally, since when did 12 year olds at the Little League World Series throw in the mid 70's? I was a senior in high school, pitching for the #1 team in the state of Nebraska, and I could barely touch 73. Meanwhile, some 110lb 5th grader from New Hampshire is chucking the ball from 40 feet away at Mach 3. Have they ever thought about testing these kids for roids? Seriously..I remember playing ball at age 12, and we had some pretty good athletes in our little league...but I'd have a skid mark the size of Florida in my pants if I had to face some lefty who is 6 foot tall, throwing in the mid 70's from 40 feet away. Don't seem right to me.

And is it some sort of rule, that every little-league world series parent has to be a complete buffoon in front of the cameras? I'm all for supporting your kids...and if my son makes it to the LLWS, I'll be right there going apeshit as well. But do you really need to wear matching clown wigs and hold up signs? Don't you think the kid is going to be scared for life playing in front of 8.8 million people on TV anyway before most kids have even kissed a girl? Why put the extra pressure on them?

Oh well, I do enjoy the LLWS, if anything...because it shows redneck College World Series fan, that no matter how much they drool on themselves during the 3rd week of June, there is always some festival celebrating pre-teens in the middle of nowhere Pennsylvania there to top them.

Hurry up Weekend...I'm fucking dying here.



Blogger Sam said...

I'm still trying to make sense of the LLWS, myself.

These kids are 11, 12, or 13 right? That puts them in 6th 7th or 8th grade, right?

In 5th and 6th grades (in Illinois) we were throwing from more than 46 feet away (I think we were throwing from 53 feet), the baselines were 75 feet, we were allowed to lead off when baserunning, and we had dropped third strikes... yet, they still told us that we shouldn't be throwing curveballs-- trying to protect our arms. For me it was fastballs, changeups, and sinkers... but I had also learned to throw a nasty screwball.

And still I threw out my arm... of course, no person-- not even a professional-- should throw 23-1/3 innings in a week (30+ innings in 10 days)... at least, not without beer-- like Dizzy Dean.

There comes a point where you just reach back, and the tank is empty... I don't know how these kids do it-- though, who was the last pitcher from the LLWS to have a career in MLB as a pitcher? I think there is something there to think about.

12:13 AM  
Blogger Adam said...

I can't beleive you of all people don't watch Entourage...

9:14 AM  
Blogger JP Anderson said...

What city did you grow up in?

Sam, how about you?

12:19 PM  
Anonymous Buffs said...


As a fellow Omaha "resident" (I would never call myself an "Omahan" or a "Heartland man"), I feel your pain. The CWS is the crown jewel of this city yet it is one of the suckiest sporting events in the US for the fan:

1) Can't drink in the stadium
2) Parking is HORRENDOUS
3) Rosenblatt is the WORST baseball stadium I've ever been was not built to hold 20,000 fans. I went to a Creighton/NU baseball game a couple of summers ago and it took me 20 minutes just to get to my seat in the outfield.

P.S. Do you have any plans for a tailgate in Mizzou for the CU game?

12:54 PM  
Anonymous Brian said...

Speaking of Missouri tailgates... Me and a fellow Tiger will be making our inaugural trip to Lincoln this Nov. 4. We will be accompanied by two Husker Fans. Needless to say, I'm terrified. Please advise.

1:10 PM  
Blogger AJ said...

JP - I'm originally from western Missouri...therefore cursed with rooting for some of the worst teams in all of sports in the Royals, Chiefs and Mizzou. It has taught me to be bitter, evil and to expect failure at every turn. You were expecting anything else?

Brian, all I can say to you is stay strong, and don't let them carry the conversation. Bring up Lawrence Phillips. Bring up the fact that Eric Crouch was 7-6 vs. Top 25 teams like that. Anything to get under their skin.

As for the CU-MU game...we were actually going to go to that this year, but had a conflict with some of the members of our travel party. I most likely will be in Boulder for the game next year to stay with a friend who lives in Denver.

2:43 PM  
Blogger Husker Mike said...

I had to go look up "Entourage" just to figure out what you were talking about.
Entourage Phenomeon

4:51 PM  
Blogger Sam said...

Suburban Chicago, JP.

5:14 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


check out this graph - numbers support the corn's talk about order having been restored? . . .


7:28 PM  
Anonymous obsessed husker fan said...

in response to your response to brian:

aj, youre like the al queda of sports fans. teaching people how to hate on the huskers? amazing my man, you are crazy. you are like the osama bin laden of husker haters. i am speechless.

8:31 PM  
Blogger AJ said...

That chart is the funniest damn thing I've seen in a while. Props.

The guy comparing me to Bin Laden...heh..that's a close second.

Enjoy opening weekend everybody.

8:45 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm reading these comments and finding them to be hilarious.

Sam, evidently you're not that good of an athlete. Just because you think you were that good, doesn't make it so. Believe it or not, there are kids out there that are better athletes, and driven to be better than their piers. (My cousin, with help from my uncle, was one of those kids, and also blew his elbow out his junior year of high school. So there might yet be some wisdom in your words.)

Buffs, apparently has not been able to get out and see multiple stadiums around the country. Complaining about not being able to drink at games, begs the question, which is more important to drink beer or watch baseball? Since colleges don't generally sell spirits at their games, I would have to conclude that you were not that big of a fan of the college game in the first place.

Mizzou tailgating as defined by my brother-in-law who graduated from Columbia with an accounting degree. "THE way to numb the pain of an embarassing loss." Although I did hear from him multiple times during the Brad Smith era.

10:25 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

#1 team in state in mid-70's, I would have to guess Benson or Burke, although Westside may be in contention. Couldn't have been Northwest because they didn't start dominating until the 80's.

11:44 AM  
Blogger AJ said...

Northwest was still good well into the 90's.

Getting warmer

12:30 PM  
Blogger AJ said...

PS - Mizzou actually has a pretty good tailgating setup. It's not Arrowhead or Green Bay..but it's not too bad. We have a great time mostly because it's the only time we really get out and act stupid. (and take in a game at the same time.) Living 5 hours from's not always that easy.

And don't get me wrong for ONE second. I am WELL, BEYOND WELL aware of Mizzou's history in football, as well as the Tigers ability to get you all excited...only to smash your dreams into a million pieces. Trust me....I know.

It was the CONSTNAT bashing by Nebraska fans throughout the 90's that created the "Bin-Laden" of College sports blogs you see here today.

(Still chuckling at that)

12:35 PM  
Blogger Sam said...

Wow... attacking my athletic ability when you don't even know me. I don't deny I was not the best athlete. Yet, still there is so much I could tell you-- just to educate you.

And for fuck's sakes, if you're going to blast someone-- put your fucking name behind it. Quit hiding.

1:46 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Northwest didn't win their first state championship until the 80's and then they had that string of 3-4 straight championships in a row. The had one good team in the 90's but I don't think they've even made it to the finals in the 10 ten years.

2:02 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


Not my intention to offend in that manner. I coach youth sports in the town in I reside in. I get parents calling me, and telling me their child is the second coming. They tell me they want their kid on the mound, or as tailback, but when I get them out on the field, I'm afraid some of these kids are going to suffocate because they have their heads up their backsides.

In my experience (with a few fathers), is that they tend to recall their sports careers differently. Most recently I came across a situation where a father was talking about his athletic prowess on the football field. I didn't say anything to him nor will I, but the thing was, our high school had happened to play his while I was playing, odd I didn't recall him, I don't even remember watching tape on the guy. Since I was a lineman and he said he was a linebacker, I'd think I would have known. I do remember that we lost that game and his play did not determine the outcome.

I played high school sports, and college sports. I was average- baseball player in high school, I could crush the fastball, but could not hit consistently anything with movement on it. I played catcher because my speed was pitiful. I stole one base in two years, and only because the coach gave me the wrong signal. (Lack of speed, and unable to hit anything but a change-up and fastball does not earn you a spot on a varsity program.) My football career was as a lineman, I was a decent high school player and played on a decent team. (I thought of myself, at that time, as better than average.) I got to college and found out that I had to work my butt off to be "average".

A name of the internet? What difference would that make? I could lie up a name and call myself Bosworth, Gerald Ford, Alexander the Great, etc., etc. If you'd like, feel free to reference George in a retort.

3:39 PM  
Blogger Sam said...

Well, had I stayed in Illinois I would've been a 3-sport athlete (soccer, hockey, baseball)... as it was, I ended up in Nebraska... officially a 1-sport athlete (soccer-- becuase hockey is not a varsity sport out here).

My last season in baseball, I did have an umpire ask me where I would be attending high school, so he could recruit me for junior college. I happened to be catching that day for the coach's kid... you know, kid couldn't find his ass with both hands, but it was father-son time in a broken home, and the kid got what he wanted.

Never thought I was the best athlete... I mean, I sat on the bench for 3 years of high-school soccer before starting... and setting a state record for saves in a season (which has since been broken).

If you want a true mindset of how I think I compare to others, I got two refernces.

I have been known to say I was the best high school goalie in Omaha... but I'd add, "it's like being the King of Luxembourg-- sure, you have the title... but just what does it mean in the real world?"

And my D-1 hockey career can be summed up by the following quote I gave the hometown announcers during an autograph session: "the reality if the situation is, I'm just the lucky fan who got one hell of a seat upgrade."

I honestly feel lucky to have done the things I've done, andbeen the places I've been. I might not be the best... and I had to work to get where I've gone... but I definately have no regrets about it. (And I think too many people take my pride as me being conceited.)

12:36 AM  
Anonymous Section96 said...

I don't watch Entourage. Doesn't interest me. Waiting until "24" and "The Sopranos" start up again.

6:16 PM  

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