May 13, 2005

The Omaha AkSarBen WHAT?!

( knew this was coming)

Let me get this straight first....I am not rich enough to own my own team. I am not smart enough to sit in conference rooms with marketing exectutives and think of stuff on my own. However, I did sit in a room and decide to call the local baseball team the Golden Spikes, so I guess that makes me qualified to comment on Omaha's newest lame professional team.

I'm not going to lie to you....the subject of yet another hockey team in Omaha is boring to me. I'm not planning on going to the games. I don't piss and moan that the "atmosphere" at the Qwest Center isn't any good....I just don't see how a lot of this affects me. However, because it is the hot button topic of the day..and people sometimes turn to me for their daily dose of hatred and rage....I feel it is my duty to tell you what you already know: The name AkSarBen is fucking lame. Not just kinda lame...I'm talking New Kids on the Block reunion lame. How absolutely self-absorbing do you have to be to name a non-profit, philantripic organization in your team name. What's next? The American Cancer Society of Aneheim Angels?

And isn't that just a little too close of a logo to that team that used to play at Hitchcock, moved to AkSarBen, then fled to Council Bluffs? And THIRTY bucks to watch goon-based sloppy hockey? IN a shitty dump like the Civic? thanks. I think I'll pass.

Much like college football is better than the NFL, much like college basketball is light years away from the hockey is a far better product than sub NHL hockey. It's not a bad's of course my opinion...but in this case that's all that matters. Why? Because I choose not to follow the other team. Sure it will cut into some of the UNO crowds...but quite frankly..unlike many of you...I don't go to the games expecting the 7th game of the Stanely Cup every night. I go to enjoy the team win..and support the guys on the ice. Screw those people who aren't there..especially if they long for the days of piss-warm beer, snot-covered walls and crappy acoustics.

Oh really doesn't matter. Good luck to Roger Dixon and anybody else who stands to make money on this thing. Rest won't be from me..but good luck all the same.

PS - Michigan sucks.


Blogger Rick said...

I think the AHL team is already smelling of desperation by adopting this name. It's an attempt, I think, to remind people that Aksarben owns the thing and that the money in theory goes to some charity. Nevermind that most people's current view of Aksarben is that it's an excuse to drag in 300-pound daughters of ranchers from Western Nebraska so they can watch a bunch of old guys from Omaha give each other awards.

And at 32 bucks a ticket, they're not going to last long.

8:53 AM  
Anonymous Sam said...

$32 a pop to watch washed up NHLers and many overhyped never-wases, not worth it. They're not even worth the alleged cheap seats ($13 to sit in section 96?).

The problem is who owns the team. A bunch of rich old men who not only drag in their 300-pound daughters so they can watch them win awards, but once a year they also dupe their lovely young grand-daughters into being eye candy (I'm sorry, 'Princesses') for their ceremonies. BTW, is there a point to those parites?

Who else owns the team? The Calgary Flames. An NHL team. The same NHL that has deprived us of the great sport this past year, and the awarding of the ultimate in sports prizes. Why should we play into their hands?

The successful AHL franchises are the teams competing in NHL markets-- and they do so by bringing a more affordable ticket to families. For $50 you can park, get 4 tickets, and dinner. You can't get one NHL ticket for $50 anymore! And now the AHL has come into Omaha with the most expensive ticket plan in this market-- NOT SMART.

In keeping with the history of Omaha, prior planning and common sense have gone right out the window.

AJ, Rick-- I'll see you at the Qwest in October.

1:34 PM  
Blogger AJ said...

Rick, good to see you again my friend. I look forward to next October with a team that is going to be out of this world.

Sam, that was one hell of a rant. Well done my friend. Oh, and P.S. - Political correctness and clean language are not welcome here. Let er rip next time. ;)

9:17 PM  
Blogger Whooter said...

Comedy gold, Jerry!

Y'all are some funny motherfuckers, that's for sure... :)

10:23 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Aj, Seriously, did you call the Civic a shitty dump when UNO played there just a short couple of seasons ago?

And as far as the comment that the Knights would charge more to get into the games than either the Lancers or the Mavericks, you didn't expect them to be cheaper in price for the AHL did you?

Also, since it looks like Calgary did not want to pay the attorney some outlandish fee for the naming rights of the Omaha Knights, they skirted the issue by throwing in the Aksarben name in the middle. This is completely different than what the Omaha Royals/ Spikes did. Omaha Royals took a name that was there for years and tried to change it. Calgary and Omaha Knights are creating a name from the start and wanted to incorporate the past professional hockey teams name into the new team's name.

You guys do realize with the $7,500 a game fee they will pay at the Civic per game, they do not have to get many people in the door per game to make money? If the Beef can attract three to four thousand a game with the league and team they are in, i would think that a new AHL team would be able to attract tham many.

11:48 AM  
Blogger AJ said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

1:36 PM  
Blogger AJ said...

Awwww man, I deleted my own comment.

I'm going to say this yet again..and let the world know that I said this even back in the day. The Civic WAS a dump, and still is a dump to this day. Yes, it has great sightlines, and yes it's loud, and yes the capicity is perfect...but good lord, just look at the place!

Again, this isn't my concern anyway, because I don't plan on going to any of the games or really following the team. And I also really don't have to listen to people bitch about how crappy teh atmosphere is at the Q, because...well...just because.

Anyway, point of the story is this: The name AkSarBen Knights is fucking lame. End of story. Sure, it's nice to have a local hook to it..but I think most people see the organization as rich snobs who trot their daughters out to swap spit with 80 year old men than a great philantric organization.

Again..doesn't really bother me, because I don't plan on following it. Much like the Omaha Beef, who I couldn't even tell you if they were still in town or not.

Oh well.


PS - JOEL!!! Great to have you here ya fucking freak!!!! ;)

3:04 PM  
Blogger Whooter said...

Glad to be here, you Myopic Dildohead... :)

4:15 PM  
Blogger something_something said...

Anonymous posters are ghey.

That is all.

5:33 PM  
Blogger Coach said...

I don't care what they call it, or where they play it, it's not the brand of hockey that I'm interested in watching. I sure as shit don't want to spend that kinda money on the AHL when I can get USHL and Div I for *much* cheaper. Plus, the arguement that the NHL ticket prices compared to AHL prices doesn't hold any water either. I have been to a record total of ... 1 NHL game. I didn't pay to park, eat, or watch the game. After going, I now know that I would not pay to park, eat, or watch a game again. Waste of time, effort, and money, if you ask me. The college game is far superior, and while I realize that college players want to head up to organizations such as the AHL...I still love the college game more.

Wasn't Chaz a paige for the fairy ball once?

11:02 PM  
Blogger AJ said...

The "fairy ball"? Holy shit, that's funny. (By the way, I can't tell you how refreshing it is to talk to you guys without the ugly spector of censorship hanging over our heads.) :)

This is simply a case of Roger Dixon and his band of moneymakers gone completely crazy. WHO in fuck is going to pay 32 bucks to watch Omaha vs. Hershey on a Tuesday night? Especially with none of the bells and whistles that big money fans need. (Such as briequariums, waitresses etc)

Maybe they'll prove me wrong..but this is a trainwreck waiting to happen. Now, if they would have marched this team out about 10 years ago....completely different story.

11:10 PM  
Blogger Whooter said...

You guys are too hung up on the price of the most expensive ticket in the joint. No, they probably won't sell a lot of walk-up $32 tickets for Hershey in February, but they might sell quite a few of the $13 ones...

I know if I was still up there, I would. Of course, I'm stuck down here where both local hockey teams have gone belly up in one year because their owners were fucking retards.

9:01 AM  
Blogger AJ said...

Good point, and yeah...the top ticket attracts the most attention. I also see where living in KC would jumble your perception a bit, because it's just about the worst hockey town earth, and if I lived there...I'd be going crazy about now.

That being said, with arena debates aside, I'm sure they'll do OK in the first few years. The key is just how good their marketing team is vs. UNO and the Lancers.

9:39 AM  
Anonymous CCM said...

Coach, I think you are a bit out of sorts when it comes to the NHL product. You've been to one game? And you didn't pay? I don't think you can use that as a reference point. The NHL has priced themselves out of the picture for most families in the US (and many in Canada). But there is no denying that the NHL product (when they play) is the best in the world. It's much like going from college basketball to NBA basketball. You see the mistakes and the bad shots taken by the college players. But I recently found myself at the level of boredom that I turned on an NBA Playoff Game, and damn if those guys were hitting everything in site (and I'm not talking Shaq from two feet out, I'm talking about Hinrich and Gordon and Arenas hitting from the perimeter).

The college hockey game is a great game. Much better than the product over in the slums of Omaha frequently referred to as Council Bluffs. The college game is much cleaner and much more wide-open than the others. But the pure speed and talent of the NHLers make it much more exciting.

1:30 PM  
Blogger Smitty Werbenjaigermanjensen said...

AJ, you ignorant slut.
Fuck you and all the other anti-pro sports assholes on this blog. You are the reason Omaha is still considered a "cow town" by the rest of the world.
The AHL is several levels above college hockey and miles above junior hockey. If you can't tell the difference between the AHL and the CCHA then you're even more retarded than sound.
Why don't you and the rest of the "red army" ram a cucumber up your ass and twirl like a top at the next overpriced, underattended Maverick game. Maybe they'll put you on the jumbotron!
Go Knights!!!

12:38 PM  
Blogger Sidebar Sam said...

Rick and AJ, you're both friggin' idiots. If you paid attention at all the current events, you'd know that the AK part of the name was used as a way to use Knights without having to pay the prick lawyer who stole the rights to the name. Ticket prices are comparable to both the Lancers and UNO. To date, the hockey has been incredible, and without the goonery mentioned in some posts.

Get your facts straight before blowin that shit out of your pie holes.

11:27 AM  
Blogger AJ said...

dear sir,

I've noticed you have mentioned male anal-sex and/or sodomy numerous times in your ranting posts. Is there something you're trying to tell us? Seriously... I know gay people who don't mention 1/2 the mention you do those types of activities...and they participate in it.

I'm cool if you're into cucumbers up the ass..or whatever it is you mention in nearly every post. However, I ask that even though this is an equal-opportunity board, please keep your closest desires and faux-homophobia to yourself.


11:32 AM  

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