March 7, 2007

Crashing the Party Part II - The Husker Roundtable Continues

For the second time in nearly 3 months, I have been completely insulted by the online Husker blogging establishment. Once again, the folks over at CornNation (yes, that's a real blog name), decided to leave me out, although they were nice enough to mention me this time. Oh sure, I might be a “tinge” on the negative side when it comes to my favorite local fan base, but at the end of the day, shouldn’t I be considered for this round-table as well? Why do I always get left out of these things? Do you think they’re mad at me? Is it something I may have said? Have I ever said anything THAT terrible about Husker football?

So just as I did last fall, let me take the bait, hook, line and sinker and give you my take on the epic Husker football blog-round-table that took place a few days ago. And yes Mr. and Mrs Husker fan…I’m not doing this for any other reason other than I think you need the perspective. You NEED people like me to keep you in check. Why don’t I move if I hate it so much? Simple…because without a voice like me, Big Red white-hot myopia would run wild for centuries. I can only hope that someday, when I'm long gone...somebody will look back and say, "that crazy bastard was right."

My friends….the envelopes please:

- What's your interest in the 'other' Nebraska sports those beyond Husker football?

Answer: I love ALL Husker sports. Not because I actually like volleyball or swimming or tennis or anything that is hard to do, yet completely devoid of all interest. No, I love ALL Husker sports, because that is where my favorite person…Husker fan hangs out. Don’t get me wrong, Husker fan won’t just hang out at any old event where a big ugly N is present. Oh sure, you’ll have your token 2,000 AARP members who pack into the NU Coliseum to watch volleyball like they're at an Art Linkletter seminar on term life insurance at the North Platte Holiday Inn. No, those Husker fans are harmless. The Husker fans I love are the ones that wear Tommie Frazier jerseys to baseball games. The Husker fans I love are big time “Volleyball” fans who have been fans “forever”, yet couldn’t tell you why they now score all the way to 30 in a game rather than 15.

Sure football rules the roost (farm reference, get it?) around here, but Husker hypocrisy and idiocy can be found pretty much anywhere. I’m sure if I went to a speech and debate meet somewhere near oldfather hall on campus, there is bound to be one idiot parent screaming “GO BIG RED” after their nerd son just finished their 3rd place Dramatic Interputation piece.

So to answer your question Mr. Moderator, my heart belongs to football, but my disdain lies in any and all Husker sports that attract the best and worst in Husker fans. Quite frankly if the Huskers had a squad of mentally challenged water polo players, I’d probably boo them too until my throat stopped bleeding.

- In which sport besides football would you like Nebraska to succeed most and why?

Answer: Who’s to say I want football to succeed the most? Why is that automatically part of the equation? What if I was the parent of a 300lb co-ed from Sydney, NE who was a member of the rifle team? Wouldn’t I want to see them succeed more than the over hyped, over-analyzed, over-rated football team who’s every practice, walk-through and film session is documented, filmed and put on NETV, only to be hosted by Kevin and Adrian?

But alas, that’s not part of the question, so I shall answer it properly. I think if I had to sit back and think about it, I would want the men’s basketball team to succeed the most. Not because I think they ever will (zero NCAA tourney wins in 70 years will give you that impression), but because that will do a lot of mental damage to a lot of people. Those people I’m talking about? JayHuskers.

You know who I’m talking about don’t you? Wouldn’t Biff and Chaz from row 3, seat 4 and 5 in the Creighton student section be left in a tizzy if they had to choose between the out of control Creighton bandwagon, and the right of the fatherland, that is says every Nebraska son must root for the Huskers in all cases? (Unless a rival university that doesn’t have a football team gets really good in a sport that isn’t football and plays in a great new arena that serves beer.) I mean, the little spats between Husker and Bluejay fans now are pretty lame…how incredible would the slap fight be if there were TWO bandwagons to fight over? People’s heads would explode, and the rest of us would find it incredibly entertaining. Oh sure, we’d have to put up with Travis Justice 24 hours a day instead of only 18, blathering on about the Jays and Huskers, but at least us non-natives would get some humor out of it at your expense.

Some Husker fans have the attitude that former athletic director Bill Byrne focused too much on 'other' sports which hurt the success of the football team. Do you agree with that statement?

Answer – Well let’s see. Steve Pederson probably doesn’t even know where the Devaney Center is, and what’s that gotten you? A 10am game on New Years day? A Big 12 Title game loss over Oklahoma? Your basketball team is still the 10th best team out of 12, your baseball team lost to San Francisco and Manhattan at HOME last spring to end their season. The Volleyball team won the national championship, but how many schools compete at that level of volleyball? The Pac-10 schools and…..???? Besides, didn’t they win that tile in Omaha? Not much of a home court advantage there.

Anyhow, I can’t possibly see what Bill Byrne could have possibly done to damage the football team, any more than Steve Pederson is currently doing. He practically built Hawks Field from the ground up. He took your baseball team from barely better than Peru State to CWS in a matter of a few years. (Sure Dave Van Horn dumped you like a drunk prom date..but hey, you got to go a few times didn’t you?)

As an avid hater of all things Husker, I for one applaud Steve Pederson for not only destroying precious Nebraska football “tradition”, but also neglecting all other Husker sports (except volleyball), to the point that I don’t have to deal with arrogant fans as much anymore. But then again, now we have the same fans wearing Creighton t-shirts, so really what difference does it make? Next question please.

And as a follow up to the previous question, do you think that the 'other sports' detract from or compliment Husker football?

Answer – Is this a trick question? “Detract” from Husker football? What on earth could “detract” from Husker football between the Sand Hills and the Henry Doorly Zoo? If the pussycat dolls were playing nude team handball in jello at mid court of the Devaney Center, you still would only draw about 1/20th the crowd that you would if Kevin Cosgrove was breaking down film in the same gym. It’s not a bad thing…well…it is. It’s just expected. Football will always be first here, and there’s nothing anybody can do about it. (Although Steve Pederson and Bill Callahan are trying.) Hell, if the football team did go down the toilet and people stopped caring, what the hell would I write about? Anna Nicole Smith all day? Uhhhh…no.

I can’t wait for the Husker baseball round-table. I’ve got a brand new Tommie Frazier jersey, and I can’t wait to show it off to all the beer gardens on 13th street during the series.




Anonymous obsessed husker fan said...


did you and "husker" mike, aka lil frankie solich spoon last night too after the "roundtable"?

im going to go take a nap now, if youre going to bash something, at least be original.

2:57 PM  
Blogger AJ said...

They called me's March..what the fuck else do I have to write about?

I'm wide open to suggestions, because I have not once met your rather high expectations.

Oh..I've got another hockey post coming, so I thought I'd warn you.

You're worse than a damn woman. Make up your mind.

3:36 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sorry this long but I had to respond to your Anti-Husker roundtable responces.

“when I'm long gone...somebody will look back and say, "that crazy bastard was right” While I don’t think you are necessarily crazy (a bit misinformed perhaps) you will never be totally right about everthing in Huskerdom as the proceeding evedience shows:

Have you ever been to a Husker volleyball game? Outside of common crazed Husker football fan the volleyball contingent is as devoted to the sport as humanly possible. The 2,000 (more like 5,500) “AARP members” can create an amazing, and more importantly intimidating, atmosphere that is considered one of the best in the nation (second in attendance only to Hawaii who draws sometimes 10,000+). Also, many fans of Husker volleyball can tell you about rally scoring and rattle off pros and cons about it pertaining to the sport. Regarding the “Go Big Red” at inappropriate times reference I sadly admit that I have done this before (not at a debate meet though). More often than not it is meant for comedic purposes much like the improptu “U-S-A…U-S-A” chant.

Regarding the rifle team they are actually pretty good (beating the likes of actual military universities like Air Force and Army from time to time). However, even if my dauther was on scholarship for the rifle team would you actually think I would put its program (which is a non-revenue sport) above the football team (huge money making machine that keeps the rifle team a program here)?

Being a Nebraska basketball fan (I have credentials to prove it!) the whole bandwagon episode wouldn’t really effect me all that much although it would spice the games up a bit. Also, Travis Justice hurts my brain when he talks.

AJ…AJ…AJ…why do you comment on volleyball when you obviously know JACK SHIT about the sport. “The Volleyball team won the national championship, but how many schools compete at that level of volleyball? The Pac-10 schools and…” 301 other schools ( which is more than both 1-A/1-AA football combined. As for which teams are part of the elite you can include all of the Pac-10 but also all of California and Hawaii, the SEC, Big 10, and more importantly Big 12 as well. Also, says who they don’t win the title away from home? You, since you’re such an expert? They have won titles outside of Nebraska before and more than likely will do it again. We shall see if they can get it done in Sacramento this year.

Also, you can rip on Stevie P. for blunders on football and the whole “we will not surrender the Big 12” speech but how has he failed on the other fronts in sports? He hired a basketball coach in AUGUST who proved to be pretty decent and has a winning record this year. Did anyone expect anything higher this year? Maybe, but not by much. Lower? With the decreased amount of time to work and a plethora of injuries…hell yeah. So far Steve-O has done a decent job there. As for baseball what the heck was he supposed to do about a late season slump? Fire Mike Anderson so you (and others) can load the cannon on “high expectations at Nebraska” again? By the way, when was the last time Missouri went to the CWS? Oh, that’s right…1964.

For the record, if the Pussycat dolls were playing naked volleyball (I don’t know the rules to handball…plus that might be painful naked) I would totally be the first one there…with a radio to listen to the Husker game.

5:50 PM  
Blogger AJ said...

I actually enjoyed that. A few things though:

1) thanks for reading
2) Don't ever start talking about volleyball like it's a sport anybody but you people care about. (They don't)
3) Rifle? I wasn't making fun of it so you can defend it.
4) Mizzou has won a CWS...have you?
5) Mizzou made it to the Super Regionals last year and had to do it on the did you do?
6) If not for Alex Maric, you may not have won a game. With him, you finished 10th. Nice job.

Are you happy? You made me talk about college baseball. Now I gotta go take a shower. Damn you.

6:23 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thanks for the cordial response. Additional thoughts:

1) Although sometimes completely off the wall it is an easy read.
2) I’ve said this before but I could give a rat’s ass if nobody cares that much for volleyball. It’s fun to watch (tight spandex included), those girls are super athletic, and we have a good program. That’s enough for me. I can recognize the fact that other people don’t care but you obviously do since your posting about it.
3) Rifle? I wasn’t trying to defend it but just making a point on how if I were a parent of an athlete on one of these minor teams (that produce little to no revenue) I shouldn’t think that my child’s program should be above football’s since they are the ones that practically earn money for the entire athletic department.
4) Your right. In baseball Missouri has one up on us. However, since that title was won when Eisenhower was in office and your team hasn’t been to Omaha in 43 years I think it loses some merit. Plus, shit talk on national titles from a Mizzou fan? What with your grand total of…2…in 138 years…nice. Hey at least you beat out KSU in that department.
5) See previous response. What you can also do is look at Mizzou and Nebraska’s record in baseball the past ten years if you need any further proof (and to say again I was rooting for Missouri/Oklahoma to win so that at least one Big 12 school got in).
6) Granted, having a huge Aussie in the paint definitely helps the cause I don’t necessarily find him as the “key to success”to win a game. Besides singlehandedly pounding K-State I don’t find him to be playing at full potential every time. He seems to think that everytime he goes up for a shot that he is going to be fouled so he half-asses it and completely misses an easy layup or hook shot. He must not have gotten the memo that “THIS IS THE BIG 12, BROTHER. IF YOU WANT TO HAVE EVERY FOUL CALLED, GO PLAY INTRAMURALS!!!”

I’m happy to talk more baseball if you want. Oh, and don’t blame me for talking about it, you mentioned the grand old game in your post.

9:12 PM  
Blogger AJ said...

It's March..what the hell else am I going to talk about?

And you brought up the whole "National Title" bullshit..not me. I'm simply pointing out a truthful fact that says Mizzou has won a National Title in baseball, and NU hasn't. This is a TRUE fact. Mizzou got further than NU LAST year...another TRUE fact.

After that..I really don't give a shit.

And by the don't see Maric as a key to Husker success in basketball this year? Uhhh....Huh? 41 points against KSU..ring a bell?

You made very good points...but that one reeked of bong water.

10:22 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Mizzou vs Nu is not the argument. The argument is the so called greatest fans in the country. They talk about selling the qwest out for volleyball when no one mentions that half the crowd left after nu played.

I was at the CWS game the first or second year nu made it on sunday's loser's bracket game. Nebraska played first. After the game, the crowd scattered. Under 10,000. Sitting next to the dugout, the espn camera man told us they were under strict orders from the ncaa not to show the crowd (or lack of). It was embarrassing to the ncaa and the cws.

If you really want to start a rant, let's talk about fundraising. I read these comments from husker fans acting like they have sweat blood to donate money. Iowa athletics have consistently raised 3-4 times the amount of money nu has. I'll find the link and post it here. And Iowa has never won at anything except wrestling. So dont tell me about the greatest fans in the world. They need to put their money where their mouth is. Because if this football experiment flops, this athletic dept is in serious financial trouble.

11:47 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said..., I didn't mention national titles first, you did. The only thing I pointed out was the fact that Missouri hasn't been to the "Big O" since 64'. I'm all for truthiness by don't put words into my mouth. Besides, you went further in the tournament than us ONE year...hooray.

I appreciate referencing me to the urban drug culture but I did mention Maric's asspounding of KSU..."Besides singlehandedly pounding K-State I don’t find him to be playing at full potential every time"...ring a bell? All I'm saying here is that yes, he can be a great asset on the floor but not the ENTIRE reason we won most of those games. If he is hot and dominating the inside but we don't have and outside help more than likely we were screwed this year. Plus his missed A LOT of easy baskets this year which means he could have been an even bigger force than he was.

5:32 PM  
Blogger AJ said...

Good points, but I still disagree on the Maric take.

7:45 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wait point was Anonymous (#3) trying to make? Husker fans only care about Husker sports? Uummm...duh. To be great fans of your team you need to watch other teams? I believe most people think we are the greatest fans for our team's sport because we show a lot The Qwest sold out because Nebraska had a chance to play there for a title? No shit Sherlock, the majority of the people there were Husker fans. That whole label of "greatest fans in college volleyball" (which was produced by the media in this case) probably stems from the fact that a lot of people care about HUSKER volleyball, not volleyball in general. If you see the label "greatest fans OF volleyball" then you have a point. A true testament to the Omaha sports enthusiasts as "greatest fans" would be next year's 1st/2nd rounds in basketball. Since Nebraska isn't good at basketball (and wouldn't be playing there anyway) I would like to see how many people show up to the event.

Also, I'm tired of many people (including you AJ) misinterpreting the whole "greatest fans" label. At each of Memorial Stadium's entrances it states "Through these gates pass the Greatest Fans in College Football." It doesn't say anything about volleyball, baseball, basketball, track, bowling, rifle, etc. I am a fan of all things Husker. I show my support in whichever way I can. I believe there are a lot of people like me. However, I don't see myself (and my Husker loving comrades) as "Greatest Evar in All Sports!!111!!1!"

9:01 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Off topic a bit....It's NCAA Tournament time, and with it comes the hell that is KU basketball. Can you assit me in come up with some new ways to hate KU? They are pretty good this year, and I need some new material....

8:18 PM  

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