April 8, 2007

It's Spring Game week in Hickland

You know what I hate?

Peeps.

I seriously hate them. Actually, I pretty much hate all Easter candy. Who the hell decided that food-colored sugar sprinkled on a matted-down piece of white goo would be considered a sugary treat? Who decided that jelly beans were worth a shit? God I hate jellybeans as well. It’s almost as if all of the candy and greeting card people got together and picked on Easter. OK, it’s 6 months away from Halloween and long after Christmas. Why not just dump all of our shitty candy into one holiday, throw on Charlton Heston every year on TV and call it good? Don’t get me wrong, I understand the reason for the holiday and all of that. But if companies are going to exploit a holiday, then go balls out. Don’t color M&M’s baby blue and call it good.

I hope your holiday was good. Easter marks the start of the longest stretch of sports wasteland known to man. Now that the NCAA tourney is over and the Masters is complete, what is left to look forward to? I’ll tell you what…

SPRING FOOTBALL!!!

Yes, leave it to Nebraska to exploit a perfectly good spring weekend, and make something out of absolutely NOTHING. I’ve ranted on this for so long, I have no idea what angle to hit on it. I mean, where do I start? The 45 year old complete losers who sprint at full speed to get Franz Hardy’s autograph? (Jesus man, you’re 45, a full beard and have a driver’s licence..what the fuck do you need some 20 year old kid’s signature for?) Do I rant on JC? (Too easy). Do I rant on the intense wave of myopic horseshit that seems to permeate out of the keyboard of thousands of Nebraska message board posters across cyberspace? (Oooo, that’s a good one). Nah. Why not just sit back and wait, and crack on the inevitable stories to come out of the Nebraska media next weekend. Without even thinking, I can tell you what they are:

- J.C. Keller looks great
- Nebraska fans are the greatest on earth because they fill a scrimmage.
- Road Construction on I-80. (But don’t worry, it’ll be done by October)
- Some fat lineman lost a bunch of weight
- Some skinny Wide Receiver put on a bunch of weight.
- Steve Pederson pissed somebody off
- The offense looked great
- The defense looked great
- Ticket prices are going up, but people love their Huskers anyway
- A new scoreboard is being built somewhere

Did I miss anything?

Speaking of Husker fans who miss stuff, I would be sorry if I didn’t mention this. As one of my loyal readers likes to point out, there is absolutely no coloration between the behavior of players and coaches and the results on the field. Fans want quality players, quality coaches and a successful program. In other words, “Integrity = happy fans”

Although I point to Tom Osborne and his ability to sell his soul for wins by recruiting thugs and criminals, I give you yet another shining example of this theory in action.

Enter my favorite fan base in the Big 12, the K-State Wildcats. As you probably know by now, the purple nation was completely screwed by a fast-talking con-artist who also served as their basketball coach. Huggins electrified Manhattan by bringing in top recruits, a fourth place finish in the Big 12, and a future as bright as the sun. But just as things were starting to settle down, Huggins did what other selfish coaches do, and that’s follow the money to a place where he would be on Sportscenter more often, and make more money doing it.

On a granular level, I don’t blame KSU fan for being pissed off. The guy completely used them for his own personal gain when nobody else would give him a chance. Although most other fans knew the guy was a complete slimeball, KSU fans decided to welcome him with open arms. I’d be pissed off too if I were them, as nobody really deserves that fate.

But the point I’m trying to make is this…K-State got excited because they were finally winning basketball games again. They were on Sportscenter from time to time (rather than never), and were actually watching other people play on the Thursday of the Big 12 tourney. They got a taste of big-time basketball, and they liked it. But why? Did they like it because a guy like Jim Woolridge was bringing in quality students and tough-nosed defenders? Hell no, they were happy, because their roster was filling with big-time talent, and big-time egos. Guys who could barely qualify, yet jump out of the gym were heading to Manhattan, all to the delight of the folks at the Bram.

So how is this different than Tom Osborne and his merry band of thugs? Because K-State knew they were going out on a limb to hire this guy. They weren’t sitting back, talking about how much morally superior they were, while having guys drag some poor girl down the stairs after he found her banging the backup QB. K-State fan was happy, because their new coach was bringing in questionable characters….thugs.

And yes…thugs = happy fans.

You can spin in. You can claim to be superior in every single way that you can think of. But when it comes down to it, Bob Huggins and Tom Osborne are one in the same. The only difference was, Huggins got fired because of a DUI and kicked out…meanwhile Osborne hid under a veil of boredom seldom seen from anyone other than librarians and insurance salesmen.

Both are slimy. Both sell their soul for wins. And both are what is wrong with college athletics. The only difference is, Huggins doesn’t have a field named after him.

21 Comments:

Blogger Adam said...

Hey dillweed, I said no mustard on my burger.

8:26 AM  
Blogger AJ said...

That's DOCTOR Dillweed to you.

10:24 AM  
Anonymous bhg said...

AJ,

You'd have us believe that we (Husker fans) are not in touch with reality, yet you want us to buy hook line and sinker, THUGS=HAPPY FANS, that is hilarious.

Give us the bench warmer, second string JV reason, "because I said so". Better yet, point to one incident and make an all encompassing statement.

Let's share some more generalizations and try to pass them off as facts:

1) Bloggers against Nebraska football have no knowledge of stats analysis.

2) Bloggers against Nebraska football have limited intellect and ability to formulate reason.

3) Bloggers against Nebraska football think they played college sports on a competitive level, (and "know all about the program").

4) Bloggers against Nebraska football don't deal with reality well.

5) Bloggers against Nebraska football believe "because I said so" works in the real world.

6) Bloggers against Nebraska football don't understand the "transitive property".

7) Bloggers against Nebraska football, believe you can "prove a negative".

Hey, give me a burn that really zings me. "We're" getting tired of the "just let it go" stuff.

(Forgive me but THUGS=HAPPY FANS is WAAAAAAAAAAY too big of a target.)

12:23 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Name one thug recruited to KSU during Huggins tenure.

1:10 PM  
Blogger AJ said...

BHG - That is the worst attempted comeback I have ever seen on this blog, and that is saying something. I'm sure it all made sense in your head..but somewhere between your brain and your hands...it got lost. Please try again, so I can understand what the hell you are talking about.

I think you missed the bottom line here..which was me successfuly comparing Huggins to Osborne.

As for Huggins and thugs...he may not have had the opportunity at KSU to do so..but he certainly had the history. I'm guessing a 0.0% graduation rate might be a bit of a red flag.

Again, I don't blame K-State for trying it...but the guy was a known bad dude. I'm not sure what made people think they could change him.

2:41 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I believe that bhg was trying to say your argument of THUGS=HAPPY FANS is weak as shit even with this new spin to include Bob Huggins/TO. Also, that generalizations don't work when trying to make an argument.

Was every player on those championship teams considered a "thug"? What about those that came before the 90's when we were still having 9 win seasons under TO? Was there any "thugs" on the 2001 team under Solich?

To maybe clear things up a little I think what you might need to do is define what actually constitutes a "thug". A criminal record? A big ego (like those recruited by Huggins supposeably)? NAMBLA member?

Also, in conjunction with the other anonymous repose how do you know Huggins would have recruited "thugs" while at KSU? Just because of his past? Tsk Tsk AJ...you broke commandment 5 of bhg's 7 Commandment's of Bloggers Against Nebraska Football Overgeneralizations. You need to pray to J.C. Keller for forgiveness.

4:32 PM  
Blogger TB said...

i don't think we wanted to change him, but huggins' image in the media was worse than reality often indicated. i hate the way the NCAA calculates graduation rates, but that's another story. either way, it was a gamble that blew up in our face.

anyway, it seems like husker fans will always be stuck in 1950, thinking college sports is all about johnny dogood getting his degree and giving his all for alma mater on fall saturdays. sorry boys, it's all about money and winning now, and it ain't going back.

i'd formulate it as "big egos=happy fans."

5:44 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

the only differnce between Thuggy and Osborne is the grad rates. oh and Osborne thinks alcohol is cocaine and Thuggy loves the alcohol.

One more thing...for some reason Osborne has a national rep as being so squeaky clean...why is that AJ?

5:58 PM  
Blogger AJ said...

Couple of things here:

1) Only I could get you people this fired up in April.

2) No other human on earth has compared Huggins to Osborne.

3) Osborne's national reputation for being squeaky clean? Huh? Do you mean boring? I'll give him that, but "squeeky clean? So I'm the ONLY one on earth who thinks he's a complete hyopcrite and sold his soul to the devil? I'm thinking LP, Christan Peter, Reggie Baul, Shevin Wiggins, Terrell Farley etc may be known by a few people outside of the 402 area code. (But I forgot..the media is always out to get you.)

4) BHG is issuing commandments now? Great.

And finally "overgeneralizations?" Uhhhh...is that even a word? If you're trying to say..that I am the ONLY PERSON ON EARTH...the ONLY SPORTS FAN ON THE PLANET, who thinks TO brought in questionable players to win...then you guys are even more dense than I thought.

Once again...super props to me for finding your weakness (your love affair with TO), and exploiting it enough to the news of the day to piss you off.

(patting myself on the back)

7:18 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Aj here is a link I think you need to read. It is just a short article about Dr. Tom, http://omahacityweekly.com/article.php?category=coverstory. Amd as always YOU CAN EAT A MILE OF MY CORN RIDDEN SHIT AND KISS MY HUSKER LOVING ASS.

7:23 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

you chicken shit SOB I knew you would not post that link about Dr. Tom. I know this is your blog and you can post what you want, but damn man be fair and look at both sides of the coin, and yes there is two sides to every coin. As always you can eat a mile of my corn ridden shit and kiss my husker loving ass.

8:18 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dr. Dillweed:

After this all being said. Does this mean that you are gong to the spring game?

See you there!

GBR

8:44 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I don't think any of us are fired up. We just want you to explain this thought further beings that it makes little to no sense.

If no other human on earth has compared Osborne to Huggins then what exactly does that mean? No one else is as smart as you? As dumb? You say shit with no factual evidence? Your a pioneer in the area of acute character perception on collegiate coaches? What?

I will have to disagree with the "sqeaky clean" TO comment though because he is haunted to this day by that LP decision. However, for every LP, Shevin Wiggins, and Christan Peter there is a Tommie Frazier, Brook Berringer, and Darin Erstad.

And no, overgeneralizations is not a word. I must have forgotten my spacebar. God I'm so dense.

10:02 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Funny thing is, the players Huggins brought in have considerable more character than himself. He didn't bring any thugs to Manhattan, he WAS the thug.

8:12 AM  
Anonymous bhg said...

AJ,

"Worst attempt at a comeback", and then the next guy gets it. I'm rolling, "Hey I wasn't bright enough to understand it, but it seems the next guy was".

(Just for you info Brent is dying over here.) Did I say I was writing commandments? I was making some GENERALIZATIONS in relation to my observation, supported by little substance (hey, that's what AJ does, we must be brothers. "Brothers don't shake hands, brothers gotta hug", I know that's from some movie with the dead fat guy.)

(Of course, maybe AJ's reality is COMMANDMENTS=GENERALIZATIONS. Wait that's GENERALIZATIONS=THOERIES, or maybe is was INTRAMURAL SPORTS=COLLEGE ATHLETICS.)

Let's see someone made up a word, but AJ will make up "facts", sounds like everyones imagination is working overtime. Hey wait, overgeneralizations is a word, but according to AJ, you're still an idiot for being able to use it in a sentence. (I'll bet that guy is not in touch with reality at all.)

Fired up, I'm entertained as all get out. It's like laughing at a guy with a 40 I.Q. trying to cross rush hour traffic.

For the guy that wants proof on the KSU recruting "thugs", all one have to do is point to the bullet proof theory, "THUGS=HAPPY FANS".

Say if anyone needs generalizations to masquerade as commandments just let me know, I'd be happy to help.

11:25 AM  
Anonymous mcmwcat said...

MCMW Baby!

7:41 PM  
Anonymous Derrick of Denver said...

Wow I haven't checked your weak shit in months. Your last post comparing Huggins and Osborne is too damn far of a reach for anyone who's ever watched a game of football or basketball. I see your only hope - to piss people off on the internet like a faceless bitch - is still falling short due to worthless analogies and ridiculous opinions built up by years of self-hate. Unfortunate for Husker fans this is your only outlet for scratching that itch. I see that you've also resorted to using blasphemy. Sad.

2:22 AM  
Blogger AJ said...

I know this sounds kinda bad..but I love the corn-ridden-shit guy. Seriously...best consistant poster ever.

PS - I'll try to post something out today. Damn stomach flu got to me. (I blame your voodoo dolls)

9:04 AM  
Blogger Husker Mike said...

Maybe it's time to clean the Coke machine there, AJ...

12:31 PM  
Blogger Adam said...

wow, you guys do take this seriously...

12:45 PM  
Anonymous bhg said...

Derrick of Denver,

You have to admit that this stuff is hilarious. It's like when I'm driving late at night and listening to Art Bells UFO stories. Those people are all as convinced of UFO's as AJ is of opinions, you can't take those stories seriously (even AJ says he doesn't take this seriously).

I don't think we've decided around here if AJ "thoeries", AJs rationalization of "theories", or AJs "slams" are the funniest.

For myself this is an entertaining as all get out.

11:20 AM  

Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link

<< Home

Listed on BlogShares