April 11, 2007

My, Aren't We Sensitive?

It sure doesn't take much to fire you people up anymore. I haven't pissed off that many of you since I compared Eric Crouch to Elton John. And here I was extremely impressed with myself. Apparently some of you took offense to me comparing Tom Osborne to Bob Huggins, which I'm sure many of you disagree with. But alas, as far apart as the personalities are, their overall way of doing things is not that far apart. OK, maybe Tom hates porn and Huggins loves the booze. I get that part. But like it or not, accept it or not...Tom Osborne went AGAINST his best judgment, and allowed the recruitment of guys with questionable character to help his team.

Now, is Huggins in that boat as well? I guess you could spin it either way, but the fact of the matter remains, as good of a recruiter as he was/is, he wasn't exactly drawing academic all-Americans to his program. But then again, they weren't bashing girls' heads in or shoving their hands down Miss Nebraska's pants at a bar...but questionable recruits nonetheless.

I would go on and on, but I think I've proven my overall point, which is that I know your weaknesses, and I can piss you off...even in April when absolutely nothing else is going on. Kudos to me.

* I can't get into this Don Imus thing. Not that it's a big deal....it's not. Pop culture figures say stuff like that all the time, and yes...even though he was trying to be funny, he may or may not be a complete racist when the microphone is turned off. I don't know, and I don't care.

What I do want to know is....has that guy ALWAYS looked that way? He looks like the love child of Skelator and that kid from Mask. And what is he? 900 years old? Is he actually alive? Or is somebody moving his mouth when the camera is on, and they just splice together his voice during his radio show? Am I the only person who has thought this?

Has anyone else, ever found a more screwed up looking dude in their life? Old age is not treating Don well. I hope this is the last time I ever have to mention him.

* BIG TIME SPRING GAME this weekend!!!!! You can feel the electricity in the air. Or maybe not. Husker Mike reports that Joey Ganz moved the Husker offense with ease during recent scrimmages, while J.C. struggled with his 10 teammates. Although Mike won't admit it, I think it's fairly obvious as to why Keller is having trouble moving his team: They're in awe of him.

The other 10 guys working with Keller are so in awe, so taken aback by the caliber of athlete that J.C. is, they simply cannot concentrate. This is going to be a big problem from Clownahan and the NU coaching staff. Of course, it's a good problem to have, having the greatest quarterback ever to play college football. But it's up to the coaches to calm the rest of the team down, and make them understand that they CAN play on the same field as J.C. Keller. Just because he has the skills of Joe Montana in his prime, does NOT mean they can't compete.

Of course, it's all a moot point anyway, because everybody knows, J.C. will simply scramble for first downs this fall, and he really won't need the other guys to help him out. Regardless, this could be the Husker coaching staff's biggest challenge to date.

* Is that the Husker baseball team I see in eighth place? Uh oh. How is the College World Series going to survive this June? Will the hotel rooms still fill up? Will anybody be downtown? Will anybody even come? How the hell am I supposed to fill up this blog, without 40,000 hicks in Eric Crouch jerseys, leaving the second session of a CWS session, all the while Tom Shatel is babbling on about how the CWS is the greatest event on earth, and should host the Major League World Series as well?

I'm going to have to think about this for a while.

Enjoy the April snow showers. More on the upcoming Keller-palooza this weekend.

6 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

The CWS does just find without Nebraska there AJ, you know that. However, we (as in NU fans) don't get the enjoyment of camping out the night before Husker games if they aren't there. Those are always good times.

Also, don't count out Nebraska yet. They have a steep hill to climb, but if they keep up with the wins they have a shot. Big series with OU this weekend.

7:18 PM  
Blogger A J said...

I don't think you have the bullpen to pull it off. But the NCAA loves money, and they'll probably give NU a regional anyway, even if they were a 4th seed at 18-23.

10:26 PM  
Blogger A J said...

That's why I'm here man...to entertain you.

12:16 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

AJ,

You crack me up.

For those of you following at home, if T.O. and Huggins do things essentially the same way, then guess what? (Man, just when you think it can't get any better.)

Let's take a look at the wisdom of AJ's newest formula, OSBOURNE=HUGGINS, (that's how I've seen it done before) and let it be the law of the land. Well then, HUGGINS=NORM, NORM=STOOPS, STOOPS=NUTT, NUTT=SWITZER, SWITZER=SPURRIER, SPURRIER=GHANDI, (oh wait Ghadi was cricket), OSBOURNE=PATERNO, PATERNO=BOWDEN, BOWDEN=PINKEL. That is an awesome theory, to come up with something like that must take what, weeks? months? years?

You have got to try and sell this stuff, why give it to us for free. You should really be selling subscriptions to this site.

What's more hilarious, AJ giving advice on a sport, or someone asking his opinion? (DEBATE TEAM LETTERMAN-cough,cough)

AJ, really give me a slam, let me have it. (if you didn't get the "comeback", just wait for the next guy to respond)

11:51 AM  
Blogger A J said...

Are you high when you read my blog?

I'm not joking.

9:24 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

AJ,

Let me get this straight, the man who has THUGS=HAPPY FANS to his credit, is asking me if I'm high.

Give me another slam.

Generalizations are great aren't they man!!!

8:00 AM  

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