December 31, 2007

A Quiet Year of Uncertainty

A Happy 2008 to you.

I’m not going to lie to you…I’m really struggling. After the mushroom cloud started to fade away in early October, and thousands of Husker fans were left speechless (and glowing from the radiation)…I figured the rest of the season would carry me through. I mean, wouldn’t there certainly be enough college football fodder out there to keep us going….even if Nebraska is so far off the sports radar right now, it’s not even funny?

Well, now that it's nearly over...apparently not.

Husker hoops have been non-existent since the early 90’s. Creighton would be a contender if they played in the SWAC. UNO hockey is in the toilet. The Lancers are 13 years old. The Chiefs suck. The Royals are 8 years away from .500. The College World Series may leave. Bo Pelini…well…nobody knows what the hell to make of Bo Pelini other than he wore a red polo for 4 months, and he managed to give up 34 points to a wretched Alabama team in a 60 minute regulation game.

So what the hell do we do now?

I’m going to be honest with ya…I have no idea what the next few months will look like..let alone 2008. I’m sure Bomopia will slowly build up prior to the Spring game…exploding into mild thoughts of…”Ya know..if we just get some freshman to contribute at linebacker…we may have a shot.”

No you don’t. You have no shot. You’re completely and totally screwed in every way shape and form imaginable. There is no next year. There is no “rebuilding process.” There is no order to restore…no faith to draw from. Just baseless…pointless self-promotion wrapped around a team so completely entrenched in it’s past, you’d give Harold Warp a run for his money.

On that happy note…enjoy your one last night of partying, before the dark and empty nights of January and February arrive. Unless some player gets drunk and punches a woman at a bar…this is going to be a long and lonely walk down a flat and barren road.


PS - If you have any topics you'd like to read about while we're waiting for something exciting to happen with Husker football...please let me know.


Anonymous Art Van Delay said...

Happy new year Nubraska!

9:54 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


I found this for you:

BASED on my supersnachifratchitchit supercalifragilistic football ranking software, the folowing permutations regurgitated from my BCS (BS?) emulation ranking calculation meter after the Missouri Victory over Arkansas today:

Hogs beat LSU
Mizzou crushed Hogs
Mizzou beat Illinois
Illinois beat Buckeyes

BUT, Sooners beat Missouri twice, so, OK is #1 & Missouri is #2....


6:13 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Where does one begin?
1. AJ, I love your blog. My brother is a MO grad/transplant in Omaha. He turned me on to your site and I really think it is genius. MO J-School?
2. Fuck the BCS. Good job Hawaii!(it's the game i'm watching now) You jerkoffs! You redefine shitty non-con schedule. The Mangino plan I understand, but you fucks take it to a whole new level...consider some collegiate teams next year. Stick to surfing and allow the contiguous states to play contact sports. Illinois...Oh, Illinois, I was at the Missouri/Illinois basketball game in the Lou when you homos won and immediately went into a "B-C-S" chant. Congrats friends, you surely proved the legitimacy of a 9-3 season...but at least you are in the Big 10.
3. Arkansas...suck my ass! I was in Shreveport a few years ago when you derelicts won. Needless to say, your reputation as a bunch of conk-eyed,lackey fucks is deserved. Good job today. It totally blows my mind that a Big 12 team could actually RUN the ball against a, like, super-fast SEC team such as yourselves. That's crazy. Keep fucking your family.
4. ESPN...please continue to stroke Tebow. By the way, he the JERKOFFTHESEC.COM Bowl. It was a classic...he was essentially beaten by Appalachian State.
5. I want to see some more highlights with Todd Reesing. He is a special player...especially when he was getting his fucking face planted 4 inches below Arrowhead Stadium by the Missouri D.

In an angry closing...may the BCS rot in hell. I hope the remainder of quality matchups that you fucks picked are equally as competitive and exciting as these first ones.

A True Son

PS...If anyone ever watches the Rose Bowl again and takes it seriously...just don't, it isn't a serious bowl anymore.

PSS...281, that SEC is fast.

PSSS...Whomever is in control, take Lou Holtz off the air. He is a fucking idiot.

11:13 PM  
Blogger JGerardi said...

Interesting topics until 'something exciting happens in Husker Football?' How about the 2012 presidential election?

7:44 AM  
Blogger AJ said...

True son..excellent comments and damn funny. Thanks for visiting.

8:24 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The unintentional comedy just hit a new high here: Mizzou fans calling Arkansas fans inbred? Oh my...


1:43 PM  
Blogger Big Head said...

I'm still waiting for even a preview of the Husker's bowl game. I got so wrapped up in Mizzou that somewhere I must have missed all the hype.

AJ, please find it in your kind and iced over heart to get me a Husker bowl preview. I have to figure out who I'm betting on to destroy the Big Dead.

8:12 PM  

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