The Beginning of the End
First, I predict the fall of the Husker empire. After a mediocre 8-4 campaign in 2006, Husker fans far and wide predict everything from another North title to a BCS Championship. After pounding their chest like a gorilla at the National Zoo, the hick nation is treated to a 5-7 season, complete with a coaching search and the and total collapse of life as they know it.
A few months later, after Creighton AD and head a-hole Bruce Rasmussen saves me from the opportunity of having to wait for NCAA regional basketball tickets by having his season ticket holders have not one shot at tickets, but TWO to finish off the supply (Thanks again Bill)....so what happens to the Blue Jays? Well, I’m not sure if you’ve been following them much, but all you need to know was that they were colon pounded by nearly 30 points to a team named after CBS Newsman Ed Bradley. (OK, maybe not…but still…Bradley?) NIT anyone? (if that)
Hell even the mighty Husker men’s basketball team had a bit of a spark earlier this year by beating a ranked team in Oregon. (Who is only 15-10 now by the way) Then…the bottom fell out of yet another outstanding year by losing three of their last four and falling to such Big 12 power programs as Iowa State and Colorado. Hell, even the once mighty Husker baseball team has hit the skids, and the goddamn season hasn’t even started yet.
So what else can go wrong you ask? What else can just cap off Joe Husker fan’s perfect year? (OK, it’s February..but work with me here.)
Today, the Metropolitan Entertainment and Convention Authority decided that it would be fun to join forces with the goofy-ass bumpkins at the “Save Rosenblatt” club and threaten a lawsuit toward the city of Omaha. Apparently the same group that was created to better bring entertainment and big time events to Omaha..is going to be directly responsible for single-handedly destroying the one thing that Omaha actually DOES have going for it…the “Dig us and our town” festival that is also known as the College World Series.
Yes, the Huskers are in the shitter…the Blue Jays suck gigantic donkey balls and Husker baseball has gone retro back to 1989 (Last in the Big 8)…and now the one great thing Husker fan has too look forward to prior to fall practice is about to crumble before his very eyes.
Wow….I hate your guts and wish you all the worst, but holy Christ…even I didn’t think it would get THIS bad for you.
So what’s the big deal you might be saying? (Especially if you’re not from these parts, or have never been to Omaha.) Losing the College World Series would be a near death blow to the psyche of an entire city. Oh sure, the Huskers are theirs by proxy…and let’s face it…no matter how many petitions I start…the state will not dissolve the University of Nebraska-Lincoln and pave it as a giant parking lot for the State Fairgrounds. So with that in mind, losing their diamond event would be city equivalent of William Floyd crossing the Orange Bowl goal line in 1993 all over again. (And yes save it Husker crybabies…he scored. It wasn’t fumble)
So my point?
Point is…even in my wildest dreams, did I ever contemplate a year this horrendously bad for Nebraska and the sports fans who live here? I mean hell….you would have thought 5-7 would have killed most of you…but apparently 40 years of myopia is hard to cut through. But this latest fiasco…or what is about to become an even bigger fiasco, is simply another way karma has of biting you in the ass.
Perhaps these things don’t happen if you kick Lawrence Phillips off the team? Perhaps these things don’t happen if your place holder doesn’t punch a Mizzou student in the face? Perhaps these things don’t happen if you act like complete and total idiots for two generations, and pretend that you have some sort of supernatural ability to keep bad things from possibly happening to you? Perhaps you shouldn’t have accepted that Rose Bowl bid back in 2001?
That karma is a bitch huh?
Regardless of why your life sucks…just trust me that it does. Regardless of how you feel you are the beacon of everything good and pure in sports…trust me, you aren’t. And if the powers that be in this town continue to act in this manner, you will be even more miserable…and I will be right once again.
So grab some popcorn and watch the fireworks fly. And let this be a lesson to you that for every time you throw your nose in the air and act the part of King...Karma will be right there to make sure that bad things happen to bad people. Ok, maybe that was a bit harsh and perhaps it would suck as a city to lose such a marquee event. But have no doubt, your own white-hot love of yourself has as much to do with this as David Sokol's greed or Mayor Mike Fehey's swolen ego.
I only hope karma doesn’t come to it’s senses before it’s too late.